2.14.2013

Love YOU! + j.crew giveaway (CLOSED)

to: me, love: me
It's February 14th, and like years past, you may have forgotten to celebrate that special someone who has been through it all with you. The bad perms, the braces, the pimples...have you guessed whom we're referring to? Not your mom, silly! We're talking about YOU, valentine! It's time to admire yourself for the wonderful person you are, so on this day of love, each of us deers have a an idea or two about how to love yourself a little more and a little better. Oh, and since WE LOVE YOU, we're giving away a $30 J.CREW gift card... {see details below}...


Erica: although it is so hard, try not to compare yourself to others. it seems like we always compare our shortcomings with others talents and then end up feeling down. i've been guilty of this before. but as soon as i stopped and accepted that others are good at certain things and i am good at the other stuff... i felt happy. don't be afraid to be your own original you.

Rachel W.: Stop thinking about who you want to be and DECIDE to be happy with who you are RIGHT NOW! You will not wake up one morning and just happen to love yourself. It is a conscious decision. Just make it already! Did you make it? I'm waiting... Good, me too.

Alisia: Recognize that no one else thinks of your mistakes or shortcomings like you do. Stop giving yourself a hard time and choose to be happy and enjoy life. Make a direct decision to be positive. Treat yourself the way you deserve to be treated!

Andi: Stop trying to be perfect! Always try your best, of course, but remember that not reaching perfection does not make you a failure. Accept that you're only human, you can't do it all, and be okay with that.

Misa: Do something great for someone else. I love myself most when I can help someone else have a better day!

Rachel A.: I try to make time for myself! Whether I'm going out with some girl friends, getting a pedicure, or enjoying some of my hobbies, I try to make sure I have time to remember who I am. My days get so consumed with diapers, laundry, grimy tables, running my daughter to gymnastics, or other never ending chores and errands, it is easy to feel like those things define me. When I can reconnect with myself, not only am I loving myself, but I am also loving my husband and children, by giving them a happier, better adjusted version of myself.

Catherine: Allow yourself some guilt free "me" time. Develop a talent, explore a new place, treat yourself to a shower and a nap (this is a treat in my crazy life) and then feel refreshed and ready to get back in there and tackle the world.

Julie: Let go of the guilt.

Melissa: One of the best ways I've found to love myself is to remember that I have real worth, regardless of how I look and what I do. When I remember my worth, I feel like it can create a small domino effect in myself leading to other good things. For example, I can let go of fear. Fear of what I am or what I'm not, fear of what others think, fear of loving life whole-heartedly, fear of putting my real self out there, fear of not measuring up. I can keep a real perspective, remembering that I am a work in progress. I can connect the fact that if I have real worth, everyone else does too, and the unconditional love for myself can overflow into how I treat others. I can be vulnerable. I feel most fulfilled, most enriched, and most LOVED, when I let my fears go and forge connections with other people by being vulnerable and letting my real self be seen.

(You NEED to go visit Mara & Danny's blog, A Blog About Love! They've been a huge inspiration to me to love myself and others more, and many of these thoughts stem from them! And in light of Valentine's Day, I'm going to recommend this post about love first.)


J.CREW $30 gift card Giveaway Details
One entrance for each of the following (make sure to comment for each item--the more you do, the more entries you'll have):
  • Comment below with a way to love yourself, or about an idea that resonated with you from this post. We'd love it if you'd check back after commenting so we can get a good discussion going on loving yourself. 
  • Like our facebook page (click the "Like" button up on the right sidebar)
  • Follow our blog (click the "Join this site" button up on the right sidebar)
  • Do something nice for yourself today, and post the picture to instagram. Use the hashtag #happylovedaytome & #jcrewgiveaway, tag @doeadeery & follow us!
  • Post your @doeadeery instagram photo to facebook.
Giveaway closes at 10pm est Tuesday, Feb 19.
Look for the winner on Wednesday, Feb 20.

And the winner is... #1 

LuAnn (an insightful LCSW) who wrote: Get a good therapist. Worked for me. Ok not kidding about the above but here is something else...along the lines of worthiness. I love Brene Brown. Her research shows that what separates those who have a sense of worthiness and those who struggle to know they are good enough is a sense of love and belonging…which is determined simply by the belief they are worthy of love and belonging. So like Melissa said...I believe this is what it comes down to...really exploring our belief of whether we are worthy of it. For me this is a combination of trusting and accepting me with my flaws, trusting the love of those around me, and a connection to God and Christ.

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65 comments:

  1. Get a good therapist. Worked for me.

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  2. Ok not kidding about the above but here is something else...along the lines of worthiness. I love Brene Brown. Her research shows that what separates those who have a sense of worthiness and those who struggle to know they are good enough is a sense of love and belonging…which is determined simply by the belief they are worthy of love and belonging. So like Melissa said...I believe this is what it comes down to...really exploring our belief of whether we are worthy of it. For me this is a combination of trusting and accepting me with my flaws, trusting the love of those around me, and a connection to God and Christ.

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    1. LuAnn, such a great comment! Our beliefs totally influence our feelings, thank yo so much for the reminder. You are a smarty!

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    2. Oh my goodness I've never entered one of these things because I never thought I had a chance of winning. I won my first time. I can't believe it!

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    3. Hey Cute LuAnn!! Congrats on winning!! Shoot me an email at doeadeery+ee@gmail.com with your full name and address and I will get the gift card sent to you!!!

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  3. Honestly, I'm going to take a long bubble bath. One of my favorite things to do for myself.

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    1. I LOVE bubble baths too! You NEED to try the eucalyptus and spearmint stress reduction bubble bath from Bath and Body Works. It is AMAZING!

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  4. Buy a fantabulous handbag. A real handbag. One that makes you giddy!

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  5. So totally am following your blog!

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  6. I like what Rachel A said - take some time for myself. This is why I don't feel guilty about the time I spend running. It makes me feel recharged and then I feel like I can devote more attention to my kids.

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    1. You are such a good example! I need to get back into running. Thanks for your comment!

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  7. I love myself by recognizing that any negative characteristics I have also have a positive side...for example, I am disorganized, but on the bright side this allows me to be easygoing and to serve others even if it changes my plans or routine.

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    1. This sounds just like someone I know named ME!

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    2. Me too! I hadn't come up with an upside to my disorganized self yet! Thanks holly!

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  8. Lowering my expectations about things that don't really matter has allowed me so much more space for joy in my life. Who cares if my house is decorated for every holiday, or if my garden is perfect? Not me!

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    1. Barb! Great idea, and I love that you said it has created more space for Joy. We should do things be cause they make us happy, not because we think we have to!

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  9. Sleep a full nights sleep :) I also need to lower expectations! Such a great post!

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    1. Keri! So true, and So hard when you have little ones!

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  10. okay whaaat?! erica, you blog again?! how did i not know this! as far as loving yourself, i often resort to doing things i know i'm good at... you know self-esteem boosts. we all have lengthy lists about all the things we wish we could do, but once you take the time to focus on one of your talents that lengthy list tends to shrink a little.

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    1. kylee!! i am so glad you found me!! i am on this blog as a contributor. it is shaping up to be an awesome blog!! I am so excited!
      and i love your self-esteem boosts idea... i need to remember this!!
      xoxo

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  11. I already liked your FB page, does that still count? I think Julie's suggestion resonates with me right now, as I'm in the midst of trying to balance two young children and a busy, demanding job. But I also love Misa's suggestion. I know this might sound counter-intuitive, but sometimes a great way to boost my mood is by writing someone a sweet note or ordering a little something online to send to a friend or family member. I do think it's easier to love ourselves when we're loving those around us.

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    1. Chelsea! This is a great comment. Next time I am feeling down, I am going to try this whole, write a nice note thing. I'm sure it will work! And as for mommy guilt, I think we are all guilty of experiencing it daily. I try and remind myself that there is no perfect way to parent.

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  12. Just "liked" your FB page. ;) Loving myself means carving out time to go running -- it keeps me sane, gives me energy, and makes me a happier mom and wife.

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    1. I love to run too! It can be tricky to find a time to get away from the little ones, but it's well worth it. I always feel so refreshed after I get back from a nice run.

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  13. I heard someone say once that you can't be effective in taking care of others unless you take care of yourself. As much as I wish I could handle it all and di everything myself, I'm learning that it's ok to ask for help and no one is going to think I can't do it

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    1. Good for you. You are ALWAYS taking care of everyone around you. I think if everyone had a Krysta in their life, this world would be a better place :)

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  14. Learning to listen to my own inner voice, rather than being pulled by every other good voice out there, has been a major project for me and a life changer. I matter!

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    1. So hard to do! I always try and remember that there is a season for everything. I know people say that life is short, but it can be long too if we try and live in the moment!

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  15. Those are all such good tips. I agree with "me time" and trying not to compare myself so much to everyone else.

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    1. Not comparing is sooooo hard! But in the end, it doesn't make you feel any better, does it? Trying to be happy with what you have and who you are is much better.

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  16. I liked you on FB (as TJ E.) Thanks!

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  17. Love yourself by thinking positive thoughts. Accept yourself and be okay with making mistakes sometimes. Take time for yourself!

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  18. I liked your facebook page too! So glad I found your blog!

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  19. I love getting pedicures and just taking the time for myself to relax without having to worry about anything other than being pampered. It's my favorite treat to myself, especially after running races.

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    1. Sounds like we'd have a good time together ;)

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  20. I love just setting aside a day, one full day, where I hold myself to not having any hard and fast "goals." I can just relax and enjoy - take a bath, read, bake, catch on my DVR...

    But, in terms of something I can and [do] daily, Bible study. There is such joy and peace in reading God's Word at night or in the morning. It ends and begins my day right!

    email:
    celeste@mail4me.com

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    1. Great thoughts Celeste! I think it is important to take mental breaks as well as physical ones! And reading scriptures helps me too!

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  21. following your blog! :)

    email:
    celeste@mail4me.com

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  22. Love yourself by taking a bath and give yourself a manicure!

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  23. i like to clean the house. Its relaxes me when I choose to do it and not because I have to!

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    1. So true! I'm working on a post about choosing to do things rather than guilting yourself into it. I hope you come back to read and share your thoughts!

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  24. Following your blog ;)
    Amorysnelson@gmail.com

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  25. liked on Facebook :)

    email
    amorysnelson@gmail.com

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  26. Alishia's advice is some that I definitely need to take! I am ridiculously hard on myself, even though other people don't usually notice the same mistakes I do.

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    1. I'm hard on myself too, but if I look at my whole self, I KNOW that my good outweigh my bad. I'm positive that yours do too!

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  27. I'm following your blog as Elisabeth G.

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  28. I agree with Rachel: Stop thinking about who you want to be and DECIDE to be happy with who you are RIGHT NOW!

    Going further on that - if there is something about yourself you don't like, CHANGE IT! I guess I am speaking more about things we can control (things outside of physicalities, perhaps)... but I hate when people get so upset over things they have control over! :)

    fashionfrugality at gmail.com

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    1. Katie! Thanks for you comment. I am always one to think that changing the way I am has to be so hard! I like your just do it mentality. I am going to just do it :)

      BTW, I checked your blog, and I am so sad that you are not posting anymore! I love fashion and I love thrift. Thanks for checking us out! How did you hear about us?

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  29. I am a facebook fan!
    fashionfrugality at gmail.com

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  30. I follow via gfc - Fashion Frugality
    fashionfrugality at gmail.com

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