Exercising Right After Baby: What You Need to Know

CONGRATULATIONS! After being pregnant for 9 months, you finally got to go through the incredible experience of giving birth. You are in love with your brand new baby. But you are not quite as happy with your new body. In fact, you may even still look 6 months pregnant. You might think, "What the heck!? The baby is outside of me, why does it look like he is still inside!?"

Oh the postpartum body!

It's not your real body. Yet.

Give it two weeks. Give your body two weeks to heal. Two weeks to rest completely. Two weeks to eat whatever sounds good. Two weeks to sit and hold that baby and nothing else. For two weeks don't even think about your body, and how that bulging tummy isn't quite gone yet. Give yourself two weeks because that is usually how long it takes for your uterus to shrink down. And it is not fair to be hard on yourself thinking about the weight you have to lose eventually when you don't even know what you have to work with yet.

After the two weeks, you will start to look a little more like you. Just a softer, more wiggily version of you. And now it is time to start thinking about eating better and getting a little more active. (And by little, I mean just a little. Don't jump back into your normal exercise routine yet!)

I have had two babies with two very different births. I had a c-section with my first and a vaginal birth with my second. And I can tell you one thing, It hurts like crazy no matter how that baby comes out!! The healing process is painful. After going through a c-section, I was actually pretty surprised at how painful a vaginal birth was. That first week is rough no matter what. For both recoveries it hurt to cough, to sit (or to get up from a sitting position), and to just move around. I feel like no one ever talks about how painful it is. And that is why it is so important to rest and recover. Give your body its much needed time to heal. You don't want to deal with a longer recovery because you didn't slow down and rest when you should have.

After two weeks and once you start feeling better a lot of women have questions about what you can or can't do. If you are like me, you may be anxious to start doing something active, but are not sure what is ok yet. After going through this experience twice, researching as much as possible, and talking to my doctor. This is the best advice I can give you:

If you have had a c-section:
Give yourself the full 6 weeks before you even think about doing any abdominal exercises. It is just not worth the risk of opening up that incision from too much strain on your abdomen. You need to heal. You need to rest. BUT you can walk. Go for walks with your baby. Walk around the neighborhood. Walk, walk, walk. After about 5 weeks you can start doing some abdominal breathing contraction exercises (explained below) And then after you see your doctor, you can go back to a regular workout routine. But don't push yourself until the doctor says it is ok.

If you have had a vaginal birth:
Wait until you can sit up without any pain. Make sure there is no pain when you cough/sneeze. Usually that is about two weeks. After the two weeks you can do some very simple abdominal exercises. (The simplest ones, such as breathing contractions, are even safe to do right after you give birth).  The important part is that when you start doing abdominal exercises you want to avoid excessive forward flexion, or crunches. The abdominal exercises should all focus on engaging your transverse abdominis by drawing your navel in and up.  Holding a plank is the perfect example of a safe exercise you can start doing. But it is not yet time to go back to a crunching/sit up abdominal routine.

Your first abdominal exercise: Breathing Ab Contractions, also known as the Tupler Technique.
Before you rush back to your body pump, or pilates class at the gym, I recommend starting with simple abdominal contractions. For many women if you had a Diastasis  (your abs split) this is the best thing you can do to knit the abs back together. You start by taking a big inhale, then while you exhale flex your abs by drawing your navel in and up or "suck in" your belly. Hold the abs in tight while you inhale and exhale for 5 deep breaths, drawing the abs in even deeper each time you exhale. Then release and repeat. You can do this while you are nursing your baby, or while you are doing your dishes. You can also mix it up by doing a set of shorter contractions with a series of flexing and releasing those abs for one count (instead of 5 breaths). No matter where you do it or how you do it,  the important part is that you train your body to engage the core by drawing your navel in and up. Once you are more aware of your body and you master this technique, you are then ready for more abdominal exercises.

Below is a video with a series of exercises you can do once you have mastered the ab contractions. This video is designed to be your very first exercise routine after giving birth. It is simple, and focuses on engaging the core without too much forward flexion. Make sure you listen to your body and are healed enough to do it. If you feel uncomfortable with any of the exercises, don't do them. It is ok to allow your body time to build up to it. Remember, you did just give birth after all! Once you have completed the video and feel that all the exercises are pretty easy, (and once your Dr. says it is ok) then you are ready to jump back into a normal exercise routine.

Custum Calligraphy Pennant Banner :: GIVEAWAY!

by cat:

We're having a little party for my daughter's third birthday and wanted to make the place a bit more festive. I made this pennant banner with card stock and ric-rac and then used a calligraphy pen to write out her name. 

The best part is that I enjoyed making it!

Thus, a giveaway!

One lucky reader will win a similar banner but with custom lettering and colors of paper.

To enter, leave a comment saying where you will use your pennant banner.

Thanks for reading and have a great day!

What I've Learned in Food Therapy: Part 2 of 2

by andi

 

I'm so excited to finally be sharing some specific tips on how to get picky eaters (or kids that just aren't interested in food) to eat! In case you missed my post last month, I told the story of my son Eli and his struggles with eating. He has recently finished a 4 month feeding therapy program through Primary Children's Rehab in Bountiful, UT. While he did make some improvements in therapy, I consider what I learned to be even more valuable than what Eli learned because I am the one who is helping him through the eating process. Feeding children doesn't always come naturally to parents, and when there are bumps in the road, we often don't know what to do. I'm hoping that these tips that I learned can help you feed your child and make mealtime less stressful for everyone involved.

1. Meal times should be structured but fun. Don't chase your child around the house while trying to get them to eat. Sit them in their high chair or at the table for each meal. My son doesn't usually like to get in his high chair because he knows that means it's time to eat. One way we get him in his chair is by blowing a few bubbles onto his tray. Like most kids, he loves bubbles, so he knows that if he can have a little fun before he eats, he's more willing to sit at the table.
2. Present the food in a fun way. Try fun plates, cups, and silverware. Eli loves eating out of muffin tins; he thinks it's fun for each food to have its own little compartment. He also really likes eating with toothpicks as opposed to a fork. If he says he's done and wants to get down, I try to switch up the utensil he's using or cut his food into a different shape. I will throw the food back in the microwave for a few seconds to make it taste better. Sometimes this will recapture his interest and get him to eat more.
3. Offer 70% foods he already likes and 30% new foods. It's easy to get stuck in a rut and only present foods that you know your child will eat. It's easier that way. But in order for them to improve, they need to be challenged and pushed a little. This won't happen if you're never presenting the opportunity.
4. Accept that learning to like new foods is a long process.  Let's say we're trying to get Eli to eat a carrot stick.  The process goes like this at our house: "Eli, do you think you can look at this carrot?  Good job looking!  Do you think you can let us put it on your tray?  That's awesome!  Thanks so much, buddy!  Do you think you can reach out and touch it with one finger? Can you put your whole hand on it?  Can you make it walk up your arm? Can you bounce it on your head?  Can you kiss it? Can you make teeth marks in it? Can you bite it in half and then spit it out?"  This process may take weeks or even months!  It took Eli 4 months to go from not even being able to look at a carrot to chewing it a few times and spitting it out.  He still won't swallow it, but hey!  He's making progress!
5. Relate a food your child doesn't like to a food he does like.  For example, if your child won't eat a strawberry but loves fruit snacks, point out that the strawberry is red just like the red fruit snacks that they love. If they don't want to try their peas, tell them that the peas are round just like cheerios. Drawing similarities between the foods helps kids realize that maybe the new food isn't so scary after all.
6. Use your imagination.  One of Eli's favorite games is to pretend that his spoon is an excavator and is digging in his food. We do all kinds of silly things, like telling him that if he takes a bite, it's going to make him grow big and strong. As soon as he eats it, we'll pretend that we can physically see him growing bigger and we tell him that he is going to get so big that he's going to burst out of his high chair. He giggles and eats more because the idea of busting out of his chair is exciting.
7. Praise your child every step of the way. Kids want to feel like you're proud of them, so give them the praise they crave. While my son may not want to eat a certain food or even touch it, I praise him for looking at it and even allowing it to be on his tray. I try to constantly tell him how proud I am of him. Is it exhausting? Heck yes. But he wants praise, so praise him I shall. We've recently started a chart with Eli where he gets to put a sticker on it if he tries a new food.  We try to make a huge deal out of it and try to make it super exciting. We hang it on the fridge in plain sight and talk about it throughout the day. The more excitement we show, the more he shows.
8. Use moderation in all things. Don't overwhelm your child with too much food at once. I never set down a huge amount of food at the beginning of the meal because it implies "You have to eat all of this before you can leave the table." Instead, I offer foods in small quantities, and switch back and forth between foods. He usually ends up eating more this way. Also, I don't try to make him eat only healthy foods. A little junk food is fine and helps make eating more pleasurable for him.
9. Make meal time a positive experience. Never scold, threaten, lose your patience, or let your child know you want to strangle them (sooooo hard!). Stay calm. I definitely believe that kids can feel your energy and the more stressed out you are, the more they will resist.
10. Trust your kid, but only to a certain extent. A lot of people say that your kids know what they need and should be 100% responsible for their own nourishment. I don't agree. If I left Eli's eating completely up to him, he would solely eat fruit snacks and M&M's and would lie on the couch limp all day because he wasn't getting the nutrients he needed to thrive. It's my job to give him healthy foods. Frequently, Eli will eat just enough to take his hunger pains away, but won't eat enough to fill up. It's my job to encourage him to eat more because he needs to eat enough to keep him full until the next meal. Otherwise, he'll be hungry again an hour later and I'm not going to feed him every hour. Sorry!
11. Don't try to make your child eat in social settings. If we are going over to a friend's house or to a party, I usually feed Eli at home before we leave. Through experience, I've learned that if there are too many distractions or if he's out of his comfort zone, he won't eat a single thing. I can't expect him to sit at a table he's never eaten at before with with people he's unfamiliar with and eat. I don't want him to feel anxious. Of course, I offer him food while we're out, but I don't pressure him to eat where he's not comfortable.
12. Accept small improvements.  For Eli, I consider it a success if he will even allow a new food to be on his tray, even if he doesn't eat it or touch it. Do I wish he would just pick up the dang food, put it in his mouth, chew it, and swallow it? Yes! Every day! But I'm learning that that's not going to happen anytime soon, so I just need to take what I can get.

I love talking to people about their children's eating problems because I can totally relate. I've pretty much been through it all with my Eli. By no means do I have it all figured out or know all the tricks though, so I'd love to hear from you. What works for you? How have you helped your child work through his eating issues?

Exposure Made Easy PART 2: Shutter Speed

by melissa

In the first segment of the DSLR Exposure Series, I briefly discussed the exposure triangle, and one of the three settings in the Exposure Triangle, aperture. Today we're moving onto a second setting in the exposure triangle: shutter speed.

When you're dying for a crystal clear shot and all you're getting is blurred eyes and streaks of arms and legs moving as your two-year-old runs away from you, it can be very frustrating—especially if you're shooting in auto and you have no idea why your camera is blurring every. single. shot. Not cool. Most likely you want to avoid motion blur, and understanding shutter speed is the first step to stopping it.

Shutter speed is a refreshing setting to learn about (at least it was for me) because it's pretty self-explanatory, and we like self-explanatory around here. No big tricks to throw you for a loop like aperture does. Just speed (or lack of it). You can totally do this. You've got it in the bag.

What is shutter speed?
Shutter speed is the length of time the shutter remains open for a shot, or how long the digital sensor is exposed to light. Shutter speed controls the ability to capture motion blur or stop action in a photo. It means your shutter is open for a longer amount of time or shorter amount of time, depending on where you set it. And that setting affects two things: light and motion blur. The faster the shutter speed, the darker the photo and crisper the capture, freezing motion in time for your shot. The slower the shutter speed, the lighter the photo, and more blurry the capture, allowing more time to pass and more movement to be recorded in the shot. Easy breezy.




Let me specify that motion blur is different from the bokeh we talked about in the Aperture post, and it's different from just missing the focus and not nailing the shot. Motion blur and out of focus are two different things. Motion blur happens because your subject (or anything else in your shot) moved, or you moved, and you were shooting on a slow shutter speed.

Let's have our 2 minute tech-y session and get it over with. Shutter speed is measured in seconds and fractions of a second. For example, 1/500 means that the shutter will be open for one five-hundredths of a second. Like I mentioned above, fast shutter speeds (like 1/1000) are used when trying to freeze action but decrease the amount of light entering the camera. Slow shutter speeds, like 2 seconds, are often used for night shots or when trying to show motion.

Speeding up your shutter will ALWAYS mean a darker photo…UNLESS you compensate for it somehow with other settings (sound familiar? From the aperture post? Remember, each setting in your Exposure Triangle equally affects how light/dark your photos will be). If it is bright where the picture will be taken, but you want to show motion, you can make the aperture smaller or use a lower ISO to compensate for the extra light the slower shutter speed is letting in.

In most cases with every day shooting, though, you should probably be using shutter speeds of 1/80th of a second or faster, because anything slower than that is very difficult to use without getting camera shake and blurring the heck out of your shot.

Left: f/1.4, 1/5000s, 50mm, ISO:100. Right: f/10, 1/60s, 50mm, ISO:100

How do I avoid motion blur?
Speeding up your shutter is the obvious answer, but when you do that, you'll find that your shots start losing light in a hurry, especially if you're shooting in dark shade, in earlier or later hours in the day when light is low, or indoors. A black photo, crisp or not, isn't doing anyone any favors. There are four quick steps for avoiding motion blur when your light is low. If you've tried the first step and your shot is dark or still blurry, move on to then next one.

1. Make sure you're on your LARGEST aperture. This will let in the most amount of light.
2. Max out your shutter speed by using as low of a shutter speed as possible without blurring.
3. Use your last resort and adjust to a higher ISO. (more on this to come in Part 3 of this series)
4. If you've tried all of the above, and your shots are still blurry, you need a new lens with a bigger aperture (you can learn more about that in my lenses post).
   
   

Left: f/9, 1/60s, 50mm, ISO:100. Right: f/1.4, 1/2500s, 50mm, ISO:100

Is motion blur ever a good thing?
Yes. It's one of those things where if you understand the rules, you can break them on purpose and do something awesome. But that will probably be rare unless it's something you're crazy about experimenting with. There are times when you want to show blur, indicating movement, speed, or a time lapse, and if you ever decide to get a little crazy with shutter speeds and venture into long exposures by using incredibly slow shutter speeds, it can be pretty fun (I'll probably do a fun long exposure post in the future). When you're blurring on purpose, slow shutter speeds are on your side. Otherwise, try to nail your settings and you'll be able to leave your blurry days behind.

Top: f/1.4, 1/3200s, 50mm, ISO:100. Bottom: f/10, 1/80s, 50mm, ISO:100

Photo challenge of the week!
Switch to timing priority/shutter speed priority (Tv for Canon, S for Nikon). Play around with different shutter speeds to see how it changes your photos. This is especially fun if you try slower speeds with people or things that are moving to show motion, then switch to a faster speed to stop them in time. Get a feel for what shutter speed works best in broad daylight, in the shade, indoors, and commit them to memory if you're feeling ambitious.

Good luck! Let me know how it goes, and be sure to share your questions, comments, and experiences with us!

And I had to leave you with this outtake photo to kick off the weekend, because it cracks me up. Nailed the jump, killed it with the shut eyes. But he's so focused and trying so hard it just can't go unshared! Have a great weekend! :)

SCHOOLHOUSE E&S Co. HACK: Porthole Mirrors

by rachel w.

When I saw the "Higgins Mirror with Rope Hanger" (pretentious name miright?) online, I decided it would be the perfect fit for my toddler's bedroom. And then I saw that it cost $315. There was NO way that I could justify spending that on one mirror for a Toddler's room, but I really loved it. I had to have it. So I got creative...

... and I am pretty pleased with how they turned out.  I'm thinking they would look great on a back porch as well. For now though, they hang happily to the side of my small fry's bed. I'm happy because I love how they look, and he's happy because he loves how he looks jumping up and down catching glimpses of his reflection. Hope you enjoy this tutorial, and as always, thanks for reading!

Supplies:

• Sandpaper
• Glue Gun
• 1/4" Manilla Rope
• Round Mirror 
• Electrical Tape
• Scissors
• Spanish Copper Rub n' Buff 
• Sock
• 5/16" x 1-9/16" Steel/Zinc Plated Linchpin
• Not pictured: Screw L Hook for hanging

Instructions:

Clean and sand your surface.

Put a little rub n' buff on that sock.

Apply, let dry, buff.

Ta. Da.

Fold rope in half, thread through linchpin.

Fold loose ends of rope over to form a loop and twist the length of the rope twice.

Secure with hot glue and 1/3 width of electrical tape.

Open linchpin and hot glue to back of mirror.

There ya have it! Let me know if you have any questions!

Authenticity, honesty and transparency

by Rachel A.

If you’ve been following this blog at all, you’ll know that we’ve tried to create a place where life meets reality. We try not to sugar-coat things or take ourselves too seriously. Authenticity is a word we think a lot about as we decide what to write, and is the theme we've chosen for the month.

Authenticity is one of my favorite traits to discover in a person. I love and respect people who unapologetically embrace their true selves and aren’t afraid to introduce that person to the world. I think I love it the most, because I know it isn’t easy. Like Mother Theresa said, this openness can really make you vulnerable. However, I believe that that vulnerability opens doors to healthier relationships, increased self-worth and confidence, and contentment with life decisions.

In my professional life, my colleagues and I encourage organizations to embrace and practice transparency and authenticity. Why? Transparency elicits trust - this goes for individuals too. If you are honest about your true self, others know what they can expect from you, what you value, and they don’t have to guess what you’re not saying (I am not suggesting you shouldn’t filter what you say – please don’t go tell your boss what you really think of them in the interest of being honest, transparent and authentic).

So does being authentic mean you embrace all of yourself, even your faults? Does it mean you shouldn’t try to change less-desirable traits? Those are good questions. My initial reaction is to say no, but I suspect the answer depends on the motives, as well as what those less-desirable traits are. I don’t think being authentic means to stop trying to improve yourself, but I do think it means that you have to celebrate the person you are, accept that person's faults, and then transform that person in a way that feels natural.

This is a bit of a tough topic, and I’d love to start a discussion. What does being authentic mean to you and how do you embrace it? Have you found being authentic beneficial or detrimental? Why is authenticity important (or not) to you? How do you move pass the discomfort of vulnerability to embrace a spirit of honesty and transparency?

A Glimpse of Real

by Erica 

I've been pregnant twice. Had two very different pregnancies & complications with both.
I have two amazing boys to show for those pregnancies!
I also suffered from postpartum depression after each birth.

Postpartum Depression is something that a lot of people keep private or don't talk about. I'm not sure if it is the world we live in and wanting to appear like everything is perfect. Or maybe some are embarrassed or ashamed. After both of my experiences I decided I didn't want to do any of those things. I talk very openly about it. I'm not embarrassed or ashamed because I know it is not my fault. Since both of my boys I've written about it several times and have actually had a few of my articles published. One of my articles can be a found in a wonderful book called, The Gift of Giving Life.

Here is a small account after I had my second child:

Two weeks ago I lay in bed wide-awake. It was quiet and the whole house was sleeping, except me. I quietly slipped out of bed and tip toed into baby W’s room. There he lay, peacefully asleep wrapped up like a little burrito. I touched his cheek and patted his tummy softly. My eyes welled up with big alligator tears and for the first time, I felt love for him. Actually felt it. Didn’t force it. Didn’t pretend. I actually felt love.

I wasn’t going to write about this. But I find great strength in writing, putting my thoughts on paper and getting it out of my system. I also like when people are real. This is me being real. Very real. Life isn’t perfect and sometimes I think we view people from the outside and think they “have it all.” But I’ve realized that everyone has his or her “things.” Everyone. I also know this is a subject that isn’t talked about much. But I want to talk. Because maybe you've felt some of this or maybe you have sister, friend or neighbor that has experienced this.

After all of W's scares while I was pregnant, his birth went wonderfully. We spent a few days in the hospital, all of which I felt great. But just like with my first pregnancy all of my hormones and emotions hit – all at once. Only this time around it was much worse. We had taken every precaution we thought to prevent the postpartum depression from being so bad this time. We were blindsided when it hit. Well, I was at least. I was totally unprepared and when those feelings started to creep in I knew I was in trouble. The first night at home was terrible. Both my husband and I were up every hour with the baby. Honestly, I forgot what it was like to have a newborn baby. I felt overwhelmed. I felt like I was in a dark hole. It is the very worst feeling in the whole entire world when you don’t want to hold your baby. When you don’t want to be in the same room as him. My heart was broken & all I could do was cry. And that is really all I did. Anxiety and panic is what set in first. The rest of the details are really quite blurry. Lots of tears. Concern from so many family members and great friends.

My mother-in-law ended up taking my oldest boy for a full week. We tried not having the stress of him around to see if it would help. It didn’t and only made me feel worse that I couldn’t be with him. More panic & more anxiety. It felt like I was choking and like it would never end. Mother’s day was probably the worst. I felt so guilty that I didn’t want to be with my own kids on Mother’s day. I wanted everything to go back to the way it was.  Obviously, change isn’t my strong point. On Mother’s day morning, after a few phone calls, my parents were in my kitchen along with my brother-in-law. I needed more medical help than I was aware of. My husband took me to the hospital and we thought we were on a good road. The next day I was worse. At this point I hadn't seen my kids in about a week. Not even my sweet new baby. I was pale as a ghost with big black circles under my eyes. I was loaded back into the car and we were at the hospital again. It honestly is all a blur. I remember the rain hitting the car windows as we drove and feeling like I wanted to be washed away with the rain. The medicine I was pumped full of made me feel numb. At that point they admitted me and I stayed the night. I honestly have never felt more alone & scared. I was alone. They wouldn’t let my husband stay with me. I learned a lot that night, in my hospital gown alone in my room.

I’d be lying if I said I’ve been fine since. This postpartum depression thing is hard and so very, very real. I’m not ashamed about it because I know it is my hormones and how my body reacts after having a baby. I know it is real and I know that it isn’t my fault. I have good days and I have bad days. Luckily with lots of help from many people we have survived and weathered this whole postpartum depression thing again. I’m luckily feeling much, much better. We are a little over six weeks out and the skies are looking sunny again.

I have learned so much through this experience & I know I go through all of this for a reason. If anything I have learned that asking for help is okay. It doesn’t mean you are weak, it means you just need a little help right then.  I have learned that my Heavenly Father loves me. He wouldn’t put me through things I couldn’t overcome and without reason. I’m stronger because of this. And maybe one day I will see clearly why I go through all of this.

------------------

Reading this gives me a huge lump in my throat. It's been two years since that experience and it still makes my heart hurt. But here I am excitedly pregnant for a third time (It's a girl!!) and I won't lie - I am terrified all of this will be a reality again after baby girl is born. Like I am staring at a tornado that is coming straight at me and I am unable to move. But it is okay. I am okay and will be okay. Although it is so very hard to see while I am in it, I know I will come out the other side stronger. Stronger, better and a mama of a sweet baby girl.

Pregnancy: Exercising during the Third Trimester

by alisia

Have you ever been punched in the stomach? If not, just do some forward flexion (ab crunches) during your third trimester of pregnancy. It is incredibly uncomfortable.  You can't breath because there just isn't enough room.

So how do you work out your abs during your third trimester? The answer is: very carefully and only a minimal amount. You want to remind your body that you do have abs, and that they should engage to support your lower back; it doesn't take a lot of work to wake them up.

I recommend spending about a minute or two every time you work out in a supported teaser (pictured above) or in a knee plank.  It is just enough ab work to help take away a lot of the lower back pain that many pregnant women suffer from during their third trimester of pregnancy. But don't worry about doing too much. As soon as you get that someone is punching you in the stomach feeling, then it is time to stop.

And here is a list of what you should avoid during your third trimester:

• Lying on your back for more than 5 minutes at a time (or shorter if you start feeling dizzy);
• Inner thigh work;
• Excessive hip flexor strengthening/stretching;
• Any exercises that have a higher risk of falling;
• Lifting heavy weights;
• Excessive abdominal work; and
• Breathing so hard during aerobic exercise that you couldn't carry on a conversation.

And of course, before working out at all, make sure you talk to your doctor. No workout is worth the risk of a pre-term baby. 

Even though it sometimes feels like you can't do anything during your last trimester,  (nor do you have the ability or energy half the time) there are a lot of exercises you can, and should do.   You can work your legs, arms, back and glutes all you want.  You can walk and walk and walk and walk. And lets be honest, if you are past your due date, I am sure you will want to do a lot of walking to help get that baby out.

For some women, your pelvic floor muscles are a great thing to focus on during your third trimester. You may need all the help you can get to prevent those "dribbles" when you sneeze. But for other women who may already be tight, working the kegel muscles may not be as wise. The last thing you want is to tear more down there when you give birth because of tightness. 

Most women experience a lot of anxiety during the third trimester. Your world is about to change. Exercising is a great way to help manage that extra stress, but what is more important that anything else is to listen to your body. You will know better than anyone if you are pushing yourself too hard or not enough.

And as tough as it may be at times, remember to hang in there. Just a couple more weeks and you will be holding your beautiful baby.

Here are some videos with examples of exercises you can do during your third trimester:

Pregnancy Abs

(Do this with 3-5 lb weights...even if you are not pregnant! It's a great arm workout.)

Glutes! Pregnant or not, try this one out!

Come One, Come All!

by rachel w.

I can not believe it, but we have been at this whole Doe a Deery thing for more than three-and-a-half months now!

It has been fun, stressful, crazy, but most of all enjoyable to stretch ourselves, share and learn together!

Thank you all of our deer readers for the love!

In the next few months we're going to be trying some new things, and we want you, YES YOU, to participate!

Are there any topics or themes that you are hankering to read about on Doe a Deery? Do you have any questions that you are just dying to have answered, be they advice, or something else? Let us know!

Do you have an original project you've just completed, or are you an expert in a certain area, but don't know where to share? We'd love it if you'd share here!

Small shop owner? Drop us a line, we're starting to look for sponsors, and we'd be tickled to feature our most loyal readers!

If you are interested in participating more, we would LOVE it. Please drop us an e-mail at doeadeery@gmail.com and let's get collaborating!

A Practice in Self Confidence

by Rachel A.

In October 2005, I embarked on a crazy social experiment that changed my perspective—or at least gave me some unique insight—on how appearance affects both the way you're perceived, as well as how it can make you feel about yourself ...  if you let it.

At the time, I was working as a graphic artist in a marketing department of a large company,  surrounded by really creative people with crazy ideas and discussions flowing through our group almost daily.

One Friday morning, my boss arrived at work with a list of 30, or so, arguably outrageous things a person might do (go skydiving, get a tattoo, shave your head, take an illegal drug, etc). He asked us to each look at the list and tell him, not which ones, but how many of these activities we would do for $100 each.

One by one, we each reviewed that list and subsequently revealed our number. Some people were quite conservative, identifying only 4 or 5 of the activities, while others numbers were well over 20. I don't remember what number I had, but it seems like it was somewhere on the upper end of average.

After a few hours of hearing our colleague's numbers, my boss wondered aloud how our numbers would change if the question was not just a hypothetical, and $100 was actually offered. Boldly, I declared that I was pretty sure my number would stay the same. Almost immediately, he responded, "you would really shave your head for $100?!" (Shaving my head happened to be one of the activities I had listed.) With only slightly wavering convictions, I again agreed that I would.

Before I knew it, five 20 dollar bills and a pair of scissors were on my desk.

What had I done?

I put on the brakes slightly, saying that I needed to make sure my husband wouldn't be upset. (Anyone that knows my husband knows that he would never be upset about something like this, in fact, he had been trying to get me to shave my head for a few years.) I also wanted to donate the hair, so at our lunch break, I went home to talk with my husband and wash and prepare the hair for donation.

When I returned, the $100 was gone, and my boss had taken off for an early start to the weekend. Without the money in hand, I decided there was no way I would go through with it. So, I spent the next few days going back and forth about whether or not to go through with this bet. I had many fears, but most of all, I was worried about what I would look like with no hair. Images of the Coneheads were not far from my imagination.

On Sunday night, as I was preparing to go back to work, my husband suggested I look at the challenge in a different way: instead of fearing what I might look like without hair, I should "view it as a practice in self confidence" and learn to find more confidence within myself, and not the way I appeared to others.

I should note: I don't mean to suggest I was lacking confidence at the time, or that I was all consumed by my appearance. However, a bad hair cut or hair day would easily derail my mood. Having had bad experiences with hair dressers in the past, I was always really nervous when approaching a new hair cut.

The "fuzz" stage: 2 months later

To make a long story short, on Monday, near the end of the work day, my coworkers crowded into a conference room and watched one of our colleagues shave my head. Watching their faces as I lost my hair was priceless. The photo above was taken immediately after the haircut—I hadn't even seen myself yet. And the money? I don't remember what I did with it ... we probably used it to buy some Christmas gifts that year.

While the most immediate difference I noticed was temperature (I don't suggest doing this on the cusp of winter), it was fascinating to see the difference in how people reacted to me.  An elderly (also bald) man in the grocery store got a huge grin when he saw me, rubbed his head while looking at me and declared, "Isn't it GREAT?!" Conversely, in the same grocery trip I got some pretty judgmental and ugly looks from several middle-aged women. The kids who hung out by their cars in parking lots, wearing non-conservative clothes, sporting various tattoos and piercings, who you always assume aren't looking at you simply because they have other things going on, suddenly acknowledged me. They would nod at me, as if I was now one of them, or that they approved of my new style. Finally, many, many people thought that my missing hair indicated that I was sick. For that one, I felt horrible. Even more horrible when I would get sympathetic smiles from those actually sick.

One of many experimental stages of regrowth

Looking in the mirror was a bit of a shock for the first several days, and I learned that, more than anything, hair covers up a lot of skin. Suddenly I felt like I had lots and lots of exposed skin, and it was hard not to feel like I had gained 15 pounds overnight. Friends were not shy about telling me how odd it was to see a girl with no hair, and for a while it took a lot of effort not to feel down about the way I looked. After a short time, and with a lot of encouragement from my husband, I stopped focusing on how I looked like a teenage boy, or how no skin flaw could be covered up by a sweeping bang, and instead focused on finding beauty within myself. I may not have looked like a traditionally attractive person, but I had much more to offer than looks.

As I now struggle with losing post-baby weight and the [very] early signs of aging ("No," I just told my husband, "not dementia"), this is a lesson I'm happy I've learned. I am certainly not suggesting everyone go out and shave your head, or that you shouldn't take pride in your appearance and try to look your best, but I think it's worth everyone's time to introspect on where you derive your self-confidence and self-worth, and (as cheesy as it may sound) try to find "beauty" within yourself.

How have you overcome times of limited confidence? How do you try to find beauty within others? I'd love to hear your experiences!

Exposure Made Easy PART 1: Aperture

by melissa

Understanding exposure is the beginning of understanding your camera, which comes in pretty handy in getting the shots you want. First of all, let's establish something.

Auto does a pretty good job. 

Auto means you're letting your camera guess the exposure you want for each shot. And for the most part, it's a pretty remarkable feature. Your camera is really smart. And if it's easier for you, and more fun for you to stress less about settings, then roll with it!

If you find yourself getting stuck though, or you're constantly wondering "how do I get my pictures to look like that?" when looking at other photography, then there's something you should know: you are smarter than your camera.

Pretty awesome, right? That means if you understand what is affecting your exposure, you can decide exactly how you want to expose every shot. It was a big day for us when we discovered that. It was so nice to be able to CONTROL our own exposure and actually get our shots to turn out the way we wanted them to. Hopefully I can give some tips that will make your discovery a lot quicker than our teach-ourselves, hit-and-miss, read-lots-of-books-we-didn’t-understand-yet, and search-every-online-forum-and-tutorial method. :)

So let's get to it.

Exposure is light recorded into your camera. Easy enough. There are three key exposure settings that determine how light is recorded into your camera, so this Exposure Series will be done in three parts: aperture, shutter speed, and ISO. These make up "The Exposure Triangle." I know it sounds like a lot of big words and there will be lots of numbers thrown around...but stay with me! Getting this will be huge! Each setting in your Exposure Triangle equally affects your exposure, or how light/dark your photo will be.

Today we're tackling aperture.
(see part 2 on shutter speed here)
What is aperture?
Aperture is the size of the opening in the lens when a picture is taken. It opens to let in more light and closes to let in less light. It's like a big eyeball that squints when it's too bright and dilates when it's dark, or at least it should when exposing correctly :) The larger the hole or aperture (also called an f-stop), the more light will hit your sensor. The smaller the hole or aperture (f-stop) the less light will hit your sensor.

Here's a curveball for you, though. It would make sense that a larger number should mean a larger opening, but no such luck. The f-numbers are fractions, so actually, the larger the f-number, the smaller your aperture becomes. The lower the f-number, the bigger your aperture becomes and the more light comes in through the lens. How's that for inconvenient? Check out the chart below to see how much the opening of the lens changes with each f-stop. It's crazy!! I would never have thought it would be that big of a difference. (The bolded f-numbers are those that are most common. If your camera won't let you go down as low as f/1.4, f/2, f/2.8, your camera's not messed up, it's just as low as your lens will go. You can read up on my lens post for more info.)

Aperture also controls depth of field and affects the lighting of your exposure. Depth of what?! No worries, that's where we're headed next. You can't talk aperture without talking depth of field, folks.

What is depth of field?
Depth of field is the amount of your subject that is in focus. An image with a very small depth of field (created with large, *and usually more expensive* apertures) have a lot of dreamy, melted foreground/background with only one segment of the image in focus—see image on the left—while an image with a very large depth of field (created with small apertures) would have everything in focus—see image on the right. The blur (not to be confused with motion blur) created when things are out of focus because of a large aperture/small depth of field is also known as bokeh.

Self-indulging tangent...I may daydream about bokeh, and you may remember my confession here of loving large apertures to a fault for that very reason. It's a style choice and completely a personal opinion, but I like to think of it more as better story telling—allowing the part to be seen that you want to be seen, and forgetting the rest that dilutes the story. Plus...it's beautiful. Just sayin.' :) My lens post has more info on lenses and tips on which can help you get the smallest depth of field and best bokeh. 

Mmmmm, yummy bokeh.

In English, please...
Here is a series of photos taken from the same spot with different apertures. You can see as the aperture gets smaller (and f-stop # gets larger), more of the background comes into focus.

What you CAN'T see, is that with each decreased aperture size, I had to compensate the loss of light by boosting my other exposure settings (shutter speed in this case...that post comes next).

Making your aperture smaller and bringing more into focus will ALWAYS mean a darker photo...UNLESS you compensate for it somehow. See the last image? The black one? Yep. That was to show you, in all its glory, what happened when I went from f/1.4 to f/8 without adjusting my shutter speed or ISO. If you're shooting on Aperture Priority (Av for Canon, A for Nikon), your camera should be making those adjustments for you. In manual mode, it's up to you. But we'll cover that in parts 2 and 3 of the series, so don't panic. Baby steps. Let's rock photography one mind-blowing technique at a time.

Remember these 3 things.

1. Aperture is the opening of your lens.
2. The smaller the number the larger the opening.
3. Larger openings let in more light and have a smaller area of focus (more blur/bokeh/awesomeness).

Photo challenge of the week!
Switch to your aperture priority setting and stay there this week (Av for Canon, A for Nikon). Mess around with aperture sizes and see how it affects your shots. Get the hang of f-stops and a feel for how much will be in focus for each one (try comparing your shots with f/2.8, f/4, f/5.6, f/8, f/11).

Good luck! And let me know if you have any questions!